📌 Take Action: Bystander intervention

Be an Upstander, not a Bystander.

Welcome to How to Resist, an instruction manual for resistance based on nonviolence, mutual aid, and community building for ordinary people who want to save democracy.

I hope this newsletter inspires new ideas and helps you discover ways to engage that are right for you. If you like this content, act on it! Find something that speaks to you and take those first steps confidently, knowing you are part of a rising tide.

In the words of Albert Einstein, “If I were to remain silent, I’d be guilty of complicity.”

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What is a bystander?

A bystander is someone who witnesses an act of discrimination or violence by a perpetrator against a victim and has the choice to either condone the behavior, intervene, or remain passive.

What is an upstander?

The American Psychological Association defines an upstander as a bystander who recognizes acts or utterances of injustice and takes a stand by interrupting and challenging situations that normalize discrimination and potential violence.

Examples of situations where you may be a bystander

• You witness someone being verbally or physically harassed in a public space.

• You see someone online being targeted with hateful comments or threats on social media

• You hear someone being harassed for their political views.

• An acquaintance of yours makes a racially biased joke in a private context

• You overhear an individual making a sexist remark about a coworker

• You witness a queer student being bullied by another student

• You observe a marginalized individual experiencing microaggressions from another individual

Before stepping in, a few guidelines

• Assess for safety: If you see someone in trouble, ask yourself if you can help safely in any way. Remember, your personal safety is a priority – never put yourself at risk.

• Be in a group: It’s safer to call out behavior or intervene in a group. If this is not an option, report it to others who can act.

• Care for the victim. Talk to the person who you think may need help. Ask them if they are OK and what kind of support they would like.

• Never abuse the abusers.
  It can be tempting, but it’s never a good idea. Bystander intervention is about prioritizing the person being harassed and breaking the cycle of violence.

5 D’s to Bystander Intervention from Right to Be

Safety first: Your well-being is paramount when assisting someone. Always prioritize safety and choose actions that minimize risk to yourself and others.

1. Distract

Distraction is a subtle way to intervene in harassment by engaging the person being harassed with unrelated conversation or actions to divert attention. This method avoids direct confrontation and can be effective for those who are creative or shy.

2. Delegate

Delegation involves asking a third party to help intervene in harassment by clearly explaining the situation and desired assistance. It's important to choose someone nearby who is willing to help and avoid involving the police unless the person being harassed explicitly requests it.

3. Document

Documentation involves recording or taking notes on harassment incidents, ensuring the person being harassed is receiving help first and always obtaining their permission before using or sharing the documentation.

4. Delay

Delay involves checking in with someone who has been harassed after the incident to offer support, reduce their trauma, and share resources or documentation if needed.

Examples from Right to Be:

• Ask them if they’re okay, and let them know you saw what happened and it wasn’t okay.

• Ask them if there’s any way you can support them.

• Offer to accompany them to their destination or sit with them for a while.

• Share resources with them and offer to help them make a report if they want to.

• If you’ve documented the incident, ask them if they want you to give them the documentation.

5. Direct

Direct intervention involves confronting the harasser by naming their inappropriate behavior, but it should be used cautiously as it can escalate the situation or redirect abuse towards the intervening bystander. Assess the situation carefully before deciding to respond.

Examples from Right to Be:

• “That’s inappropriate,” “That’s homophobic,” “That’s disrespectful,” “That’s racist,” “That’s not okay,” “That’s harassment,” etc.

• “Leave them alone.”

• “Please stop right now.”

• “They’ve asked you to leave them alone and I’m here to support them.”

8 Actions you can take to support upstanding practices

1. Watch a video about the 5Ds: 5 D’s of Bystander Intervention - animated video series (Right to Be (formerly Hollaback!), AAJC, and AARP)

2. Read the guide: SHOW UP: Your Guide to Bystander Intervention - PDF (Right to Be)

3. Learn about bystander intervention techniques in online environments: Bystander Intervention Online (Right to Be)

4. Attend a virtual bystander intervention training: Upcoming virtual training (Right to Be)

5. Practice with a buddy! It may feel awkward at first, but practice builds confidence

6. Advocate for training in your workplace or school

7. Donate to an anti-bias organization

8. Lead by example: Community leaders, role models, and peers taking on pro-social, helping behaviors can have influential effects by changing social norms

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References

Rodenhizer-Stämpfli, K. A., Eckstein, R. P., & Edwards, K. M. (2018). Bystander action. In R.J.R. Levesque, Encyclopedia of adolescence (2nd ed.). Springer Science+Business Media.

American Psychological Association. “Bystander Intervention Tip Sheet.” June 2020

Right to Be. “5 D’s of Bystander Intervention.” https://righttobe.org/guides/bystander-intervention-training/ (Accessed April 2, 2025)